Writers, Do the Things That Scare You

Over the weekend, I went with my family to Disneyland and California Adventure.

(Yes, I'll give you a moment to be jealous . . . Okay, moment's over. Back to reading.)

Most of you are familiar with the rides at Disneyland; they're all fun, kid-friendly attractions. Pirates of the Caribbean, Indiana Jones and the Temple of the Forbidden Eye, Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, etc. Being a Disney park, California Adventure is also family-friendly, but it has a few rides that are geared more toward adults. Or at least children that are way less chicken than I was at their age (or height).

Not pictured here: me as a little girl, looking as though I'm about to be murdered coming down Splash Mountain.

One of California Adventure's thrill rides is called The Twilight Zone Tower of Terror. For those of you who aren't familiar with the ride, it's a drop tower. It brings you waaaay up, drops you, brings you back up, drops you again. It does this a couple times, and it's a blast. Seriously, I love this ride. It's possibly my favorite between the two parks.

I am also terrified of going on it basically every time. There's a lot of suspense to the ride, as you wind your way through the hotel lobby, enter a room that plays a Twilight Zone-esque video, then wind your way through the hotel boiler room, and then even once you're seated in the service elevator itself, there's more theatre. Even the cast members are dressed like hotel concierges and speak in a spooky way. Disney doesn't do things half-way. Everything looks and feels authentic to the setting.

It's great! But the suspense just kills me. Every time, I think, "eh, maybe I'll just skip it." Because it's easier than dealing with the nerves while standing in line.

This last time I went on the ride, it occurred to me that my response to the Tower of Terror is similar to the response of many writers on their path to publication.

You know you want to be published; you know it's going to be Awesome with a capital A.

You know what's involved on the journey to get there: query, agent, editors, etc. You're not Lewis and Clark going West. Many have gone before you, and can offer advice and tell you how it works.

But it's still terrifying, right?

So much could go wrong! Your query could suck; an agent might not be able to sell your book; no editor will take you; the ride might malfunction, causing the service elevator to shoot through the roof, thus crushing you to paste while other park guests watch, their faces framed with horror! OH THE HUMANITY.

Er, ignore that last one.

You might think to yourself, How much easier would it be to just keep my stories here, in the safety of my computer? After all, Google Docs won't judge that vampire sci-fi you've been working on. Better not to try than to fail horribly, right?

I'm going to tell you something now, and I want you to hear me. (This goes out to future!Me, too. Don't think I don't see you shuffling your feet and making excuses, future!Me. I know us too well.)

As writers, we have to do the things that scare us.

Maybe that means taking a chance on a plot or a character, even when you're not sure you can do it justice. DO IT ANYWAY. Maybe you have a completed, polished manuscript that's just languishing away in the digital recesses of your computer because you're too afraid to put it out there where an agent can see it. DO IT ANYWAY. Maybe you're already a published author, worried about what some family members will think about X in your next story. WRITE IT ANYWAY.

To be an artist is to be at war with fear. Fear of failure, fear of judgement, fear even of self, of what you might uncover as you rifle through your subconscious, hunting for honest emotion. But you can't let fear stop you from doing what you love. You can't use fear as an excuse.

To paraphrase the immortal Captain Jack Sparrow, "If you were waiting for a sign, this is it, mate."

Consider this your call to action.

And if we ever go to California Adventure together, I expect to see you in line with me for the Twilight Zone Tower of Terror.

But not for those Silly Symphony swings. Let's not get crazy.

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Posted in pep talk, writers, writing

Why I Didn't Win NaNoWriMo (And Why It's Okay If You Didn't Either)

Sit with me, friends, and I will tell you the tale of a woman who believed she could write a 50,000 word novel at the same time she was finishing her college degree. Yes, right there is comfortable. No, don't touch the fine china. I don't have any fine china? Oh, then I guess you can touch it. I don't know whose that is.

You see, this woman believed in this novel, as many who begin such a journey do. The characters compelled her to write, and who was she to deny them a chance to tell their story? However, a 20-25 page final research paper loomed over November like a vulture over weakening prey. It knew its time would come. And as the writer neared the final third of the month, mentally fatigued, staggering through scenes in a daze, it could wait for its meal no longer!

Basically, I'm saying I lost NaNoWriMo.

But I didn't lose. And neither did you! If you embarked on this same crazy month of literary abandon, if you threw caution to the wind, if you let yourself dream a little bigger, a little harder (no, not like that, you naughty thing), then congratulate yourself! You've done something many are afraid to do. You tried. You looked fear of failure right in its ugly face and stuck your tongue out.

No, my friend. We did not lose. We only gained. Maybe you gained insight into a genre you've been meaning to try for a long time. Maybe you met a new character who made you smile or laugh or cry. Maybe you only wrote 5,000 words, but those words are the genesis of a story that will one day take the world by storm! Maybe you wrote 49,000 words, and there are some sentences or plot points in there waiting to be excavated from the mess and put to good use in a different novel.

You don't know. Not unless you keep going. NaNoWriMo might be over, but you still have a novel to write. You still have a story to tell, characters to breathe to life. Writing 50k in a month is an arbitrary goal. A fine, impressive, motivating goal—but arbitrary. It is okay if you cannot do that. Let me say that again. IT IS OKAY IF YOU CANNOT WRITE THAT MANY WORDS THAT QUICKLY. Not many writers can. It does not reflect your ability to tell a damn good story. It does not mean you are not or cannot be a damn fine writer.

What does determine that is whether you finish what you started.

Look at your story.

Now back at me.

Now back at your story.

Your story is now tickets to that thing you really love! Or it will be! One day! With edits and hard work and determination, it could be your ticket into the publishing industry. More importantly, your ticket into the hearts and minds of readers. Your story could be just what someone out there needs to read.

I know what you're thinking. This is an old joke. Does anyone even remember the Old Spice Guy commercials? But, Hayley, it's such a bad story. The plot is falling apart. The characters aren't showing active agency. The voice is ALL wrong. You don't even KNOW.

You're right. I don't know. I also don't care. Finish it.

Remember why you started, and finish it. Every great book today started out as a bad book. Don't give up. I believe in you. It's hard, but as my Grandma told my Mom who always tells me, "Just because something is hard doesn't mean it isn't worth doing."

Let's get 'er done!

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Posted in NaNoWriMo, writing

Mini NaNo Pep Talk (November 5th): It's a First Draft, Not a Bomb

As most of you know, today is my birthday...

Wait, no, I was going to talk about NaNoWriMo, but how KIND of you to remember that it's my birthday!

Why, yes, that's the second time I've used this gif today. Never gets old.

A lot's been going on in my life since my last update, and I don't have time to get into all of it (short version: I got into PitchWars after all as an alternate (!!!) and it's been wonderful and I have been busily revising and putting off school work like a responsible adult, and now I'm writing a new novel for NaNo!).

But this post isn't about ME. This post is about YOU, dear NaNoWriMo writer, if you are still reading this and have not been put off by my off-topic opening. *ahem*

My friend, Emily, sent me some NaNoMail this morning with the idea of sharing encouraging writerly quotes with one another. I loved the idea and wrote back, but I couldn't just provide my quote. Oh, no. I am much too verbose for that. So, in the process of explaining why I chose the quote I did, I accidentally ended up writing a mini-pep talk. A pep talkette, if you like. And I figured, why not post it here as well? If it helps inspire or bolster the morale of some of my fellow NaNo soldiers while y'all are in the trenches, then good! If it doesn't, well. Read it again, and lie to me.* (kidding, kidding)

Without further ado... my pep talk:

"It's a first draft, not a bomb."

I don't know who said it, but this quote's really resonated with me over the past year. Often when writing a first draft, I feel an anxiety about putting the words down. Will they be the right ones? What if they're the wrong ones? OH GOOD HEAVENS WHY DID I EVER THINK I COULD DO THIS.

But the truth is, there ARE no wrong words in a first draft. And an imperfect sentence will not make or break your book. We are not disarming bombs. The wrong dialogue/character/plot is not the end of the world. You will not self-destruct if you clip the blue wire. We are creating something new, and new things have flaws. I repeat: It's a first draft, not a bomb. So roll up your sleeves, get in there, mess around, and handle the story as rough as you want!

Good luck!
__________________________

*In all seriousness, if you liked this pep talk, or if it helped any, do let me know! Provided there's interest, I may write more over the course of the month. :)

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Posted in birthday, NaNoWriMo, writing

Johnnycakes v. Reality (or Why I Am a Good Writer But Would Have Made a Horrible Pioneer)

We've all heard of method acting, where actors live and breathe the characters they play for the duration of filming, even when the lights and cameras are off. But what about method writing? Does such a thing exist?

Allow me to answer that with a story.

A story about johnnycakes.

Mormon Johnnycakes, to be exact.

For those who do not know what a Mormon Johnnycake is, it's basically dense, sugarless cornbread. And not the fluffy kind either, more flatbread-esque. Quick trivia: this particular variety received the name "Mormon" because many Mormons traveling west in the nineteenth-century would partake of johnnycakes on the trail, as long as they had a source of fresh buttermilk to use in cooking. The food was, of course, not exclusive to them, but rather originated with the Native Americans. As for why it's called a johnnycake, there's some disagreement on the etymology. One camp says it was African American slang for an Indian corn cake; others think it's derived from Shawnee cake.

No crazy writers were harmed in the taking of this photo.

Now, being that I am currently writing a novel set in the American Old West, I've been rather obsessed with all things relating to that time period. I've read books, listened to music from that era (allow me to recommend this rendition of The Old Chisholm Trail; you're welcome for that ear worm), received a replica Marshal's badge for a gift, and even bought a hat (seen: right). Because of course.

What can I say? When I commit to learning about a historical time period, I commit. (I also end up watching a lot of Hell on Wheels and Deadwood but I digress.)

Add to my obsession with the Old West my newly discovered love of baking and you have a recipe for... well, food. I thought it would be fun to try to make something that my main character would have ostensibly eaten while out and about, and settled on the johnnycakes since they seemed relatively simple to make. And they were.

Mormon Johnnycakes, as made by me

Unfortunately, they also tasted terrible. Well. Terrible is a strong word. They were edible. With butter. A lot of butter. To be fair, I have a rather... let us say, distinguishing palette. So they were probably fine, and I was just being picky. But still. I am not a pioneer. I am spoiled by modern day preservatives and corn syrup. Sweet, sweet corn syrup.

Which brings me back to the title and topic of this blog post. Method writing.

When I get really into a story, I like to get to know my main characters as best as possible. I get intimate with them (not like that, get your mind out of the gutter), trying to understand their every facet and what makes them tick. Sometimes this close empathy bleeds over into real life, either inspiring fashion choices or prompting me to bake horrible cornbread. But this is one of the things I enjoy most about writing: the opportunity to experience things I wouldn't normally experience. Feel things I wouldn't normally feel. Think about the world in a slightly different way. And be grateful I don't have to subsist on johnnycakes (my MC is much tougher than I am!).

I don't ever go as deep as most method actors, thankfully. I'd probably lose my marbles, and they're in short enough supply as is, but getting to take my story/characters into the real world with me even in such a small way is great fun, and I like to think it also helps me add authenticity to my writing when I finally return to my own fictional nook.

How about you? Do you indulge in any kind of method writing? Do you find your characters' likes, dislikes, or habits ever bleeding over into your own?

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Posted in baking, history, writing

Pitch Wars: Ask Me Anything!

Today I'm doing an AMA (ask me anything) as a part of Pitch Wars, courtesy of E. G. Moore who tagged me. Go check out hers, if you haven't already!

For those who don't know what Pitch Wars is, it is an amazing contest that will make your writerly heart soar with hope (yes, breathe in the fresh air of possibility, there you go) and also probably inspire a bad Twitter habit. You may also experience some nervousness, doubt, and resort to baking in order to avoid stalking your potential mentors' feeds. What? Just me? Okay then.

(All kidding aside, here is a link to the page that describes it in a more concrete way. It really is a great opportunity to not only improve your manuscript, but also network with other writers who are experiencing the same highs and lows as you on this crazy publishing journey.)

Now onto the questions!

@Eris0303 asks: What is the one thing you absolutely cannot leave your house without?

Boring answer: Keys, cellphone, wallet, the usual stuff one might carry in one's purse

Slightly more writerly answer: While I tend to take spur-of-the-moment notes on my phone, I still like to carry a small moleskine and pencil/pen with me whenever I leave the house, just in case technology fails me. There's nothing worse than being caught out and about by an excellent piece of dialogue or story idea and having no way to record and preserve it for later!

Weird answer: An extra pair of socks. Wait wait, hear me out! The reasons for this are twofold. First, have you ever gone to an amusement park and been on a log ride and gotten your socks wet? I am pretty sure there is a circle of Hell that simply consists of being stuck in wet socks forever. An extra pair of dry socks solves this problem (mostly; if the inside of your shoes are wet, I'm sorry, may God have mercy on your soul). Second, I suffer from a condition called Raynaud's Phenomenon which sounds a lot cooler than it is. Basically, I have poor circulation, so my feet are constantly cold if I'm not actively exercising. I bring socks with me to slip on at a friend's place, if I've left the house in flip-flops or some such.

@AmyKiddAuthor asks: How will you celebrate if you are chosen for #PitchWars mentee or alternate?

Good question! I'll probably jump up and down, shouting "YES YES" in a totally uninhibited and slightly less than dignified manner. Then I'll text one of my best friends (who coincidentally is also participating and I hope also gets a mentor!) and let her know, because we're in this together. Victory for one, victory for all!

And then I'll probably play this song to psyche myself up for the revisions.

@raballard asks: What advice can you give those who aren't chosen by a mentor?

First off, I know a lot of mentors themselves have said this, but I feel it's worth repeating: it's not personal. Just as with querying, it's highly subjective. There may be nothing at all wrong with your story; it's just a matter of taste. The right person for your work is out there. Believe in that, and keep going.

Second, if you haven't already, get back to writing ASAP. Rejection in any form stings, and the best salve I've found is to keep writing. Keep working at it. Try to find your weak spots (we all have them) and see what you can do to improve them. Struggle with plot? Read a book on narrative structure. Have difficulties getting your dialogue to sound true? Try writing a scene that is only dialogue and then read it aloud, listening for any artificiality. Study and learn and improve, and be forgiving toward yourself. Writing is a lifelong effort, not some imaginary summit you reach only once you're published. We are all Sisyphus pushing the boulder up the hill; you can either let it crush you, or build some literary muscle along the way.

@ChadTastic92 asks: What, to you, is the most important aspect of world building for a sci-fi or fantasy story?

Verisimilitude. For me, it's the little things in a world that draw me in and suspend my disbelief. Petty annoyances, attitudes, or whatever is considered a mundane occurrence in that world can say a lot about it. Stacking these small details on top of one another provides a relatable sense of the world. Big, grandiose settings are great, but you'll lose me if the characters don't behave in a way that is sensible to their environment. More specifically, I particularly love seeing how religion and myth are handled in sci-fi and fantasy, since the presence or absence of religion has such a major impact on our own world, and can profoundly change who a person is and how they behave. For better or worse.

And lastly, I think language (such as slang, profanity, and the characters' daily vernacular) also plays a large role in convincing me of a fictional world. If your characters are speaking in a modern way, I'm not going to believe it takes place in a pseudo-Medieval or Renaissance setting.

@ELWicker asks: Regardless of the outcome, what do you feel you will take away from the #PitchWars experience?

Oh, man. So much. So, so much. One of the biggest things Pitch Wars has given me is the confidence to open up and talk with other people, even virtual strangers! For a long time, I've wanted to get more involved with the online writing community and connect to other writers, but I was frustrated by how. Overwhelmed. I didn't know where to start, and I didn't realize just how vast the writing community was on Twitter, particularly. Pitch Wars provided the perfect springboard into this wonderful pool of brave and determined writers. My kind of people!

The other thing I will take away from Pitch Wars is the necessity of overcoming fear and self-doubt. Of beating down that ugly voice in your head that says, this is worthless and no one will ever want to read it and you're kidding yourself if you think YOU can be an author. Pitch Wars gave me the kick in the pants I needed to get back out there and fight for my novel, fight for the chance to share myself and my work with the world.

Because my novel isn't worthless.

Someone out there is going to love it.

I'm not kidding myself about becoming an author.

And if you share this attitude, then you're my kind of people, too!

____

Hope you all enjoyed that! And now I tag @AmyKiddAuthor! You're on deck for #PitchWarsAMA! Let me know when you post your answers, I'd love to see them! :)

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Posted in AMA, Pitch Wars, writing